Somefarwhere (2011)

This starts off with a few shots of "Price" (Bryce Blais) taking some photos at the amazing Petra World Heritage site in Jordan. A few minutes later he is in his hotel room (in his pants) having a bit of a tantrum. Why? Well it transpires that he is there in search of his US marine boyfriend who has gone AWOL. With the help of cute local guide "Marwan" (Khaled Haider) he tries to track him down. Hmmm, well what follows is all over the place. Blais is very easy on the eye, and shirtless often enough to offer a vague degree of hope that something might actually happen amidst all the long, ponderous desert photography. Sadly, nope - this moves with a pace that is consistent with a wooly mammoth in these same torrid surroundings. The slightly menacing presence of the enigmatic Dale Dymoski ("Combs") - whom I though in the beginning was a figment of his imagination - could have injected something substantial into this pretty-boy fest, but sadly it serves merely to further complicate an already convoluted story that attempts to demonstrate the length the man will go for his love; whilst throwing in some social commentary about the way gay folks are treated in parts of the Middle East. It's also got some rather weak subterfuge going on as some local chief thinks a couple of queer hostages might make for some embarrassing coverage for the "don't ask, don't tell" US military but frankly I'd long lost the will by the time this overlong vanity project rumbled to a conclusion. The title is by far the most interesting thing about this and it's easily twenty minutes too long!